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Dear Gwendolyn: 

“color: #333333; font-family: Verdana;”>I may end my friendship

with a fellow female college alum whom I reunited with after

working for 12 years in another town.  After a year of reunion, I

now believe we have irreconcilable differences.

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“font-size: 9.0pt; font-family: Verdana; mso-fareast-font-family:”>I

must confess over the years I did not get to know her too well

except with my own phone calls.  Recently she sent me a series of

emails that hinted at my current unemployment, lack of marriage and

lack of children.  As a result, I have written a letter that I may

send her informing her of my decision to terminate my friendship

and explaining why.

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Ellen

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“color: #333333; font-family: Verdana;”>Dear Ellen:

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“font-size: 9.0pt; font-family: Verdana; mso-fareast-font-family:”>Do

not send that letter.  Let me tell you this:  Women in general do

not always have a lasting friendship as much as many men seem to

develop.  There were many warnings you ignored as women do.  You

failed to realize that you were calling her and not her calling

you.  Rid yourself of the word irreconcilable.  Relationships have

differences, but just plain old friendship is not physically

bonding and should not lead to where you feel the two of you should

act alike, think alike, dress alike, and basically be

alike. 

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“font-size: 9.0pt; font-family: Verdana; mso-fareast-font-family:”>Ellen,

I strongly suggest you to terminate the friendship but do not go

through the bother of explaining why.  When people think they have

caused you to stop whatever you are doing to deal with them, they

are happy.  I cannot tell you the number of times I have had to

deal with jealousy even within family.  As to her comments

regarding your single life without children, she probably wishes

she could step into your shoes. 

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“font-size: 9.0pt; font-family: Verdana; mso-fareast-font-family:”>Think

about it.  Throughout your life you will meet good friends and

false friends.  Use your best judgment, but always be watchful of

those who carry — an invisible knife. (Copyright 2011 by

Gwendolyn L. Baines)

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***Got a problem?  Don’t solve it alone.  Write to Gwendolyn Baines

at: P. O. Box 10066, Raleigh, NC  27605-0066 (to receive a reply

send a self addressed stamped envelope) or email her at:

“This external link will open in a new window” href=

“mailto:gwenbaines@hotmail.com” target=

“_new”>gwenbaines@hotmail.com

or visit her

website at:

href=”http://www.gwenbaines.com/” target=

“_new”>www.gwenbaines.com

.

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