If you are fortunate enough to have a 16-year-old cross your path; there is one thing we can all agree on: They know everything!
You know what I mean. The person we once knew and adored, with the cutest little feet and button nose, has turned into Foreigner from the Alternate Universe. While he may know the exact day and time of the second coming, it is still beyond his comprehension that the laundry basket in the closet is for dirty clothes and not an actual bin to recycle said dirty clothes.
Given that they know it all, how does one instruct the Alien – one large head with a mouth for eating, lazy eyes (always sleeping), a nose (for smelling your cooked food) and very small ears (for selective hearing) – to the civil ways of conversation, using the tools of table and, most importantly, good grooming habits that will last at least until they are married off?
Trying to convert the terrestrial back into the human you knew four years ago is futile. Believe it, they rebel in more ways than one and you have to pick your battles. So rather than trying to combat the big embarrassments they will surely endure (leave those stories for the grandchildren), strategically agree with them. Yes agree. It will throw them off. Yet save the meaningful offenses for when they want something.
With that said, it has not totally escaped me that, YOU the reader, maybe plus or minus 16 years old. If so, read this as if you are taking off a Band-Aid (it feels good for a while, but then you have to just rip off the dirty one in order to get better)
For the sake of allowing the “Manners Moon” to get within your gravitational pull, here are some pointers:
* When eating, refrain from talking and eating at the same time. You may choke. It’s a good time to listen then reply in between chewing.
* Stand-up when greeting and /or introducing yourself. Bring yourself to their level, so to speak.
* Tuck in the shirt, belt loops are for belts and remove your hat (indoors or in the presence of a female). What! The shirt looks better out and it’s a baseball cap. No pumpkin, it does not. So remove the cap and pull your pants up, while you are at it.
* Exposed boobs, belly and butt are firmly coarse (excuse the pun). Some thinks it looks inviting, yet the responders are not the type your grandmother would approve of.
* Always be on time. Time is money and the statistics are always the same. We all have only 24 hours in a day. When you are late, you are saying their precious time is not important to you. You figuratively lose your value.
Let’s just stipulate that teens have their own orbit. Most of the time it’s spinning so fast and wide, they may seem a little out of sorts. But with ongoing practice of some simple standards, in time; they do come back down to earth.
©2009 Madolena Key, Mannerisms LLC, www.mannerismsllc.net 636 398-manr (6267)