I know it was raining, but hey y’all could have shown up especially on behalf of folks that have been devastated by a 7.0 EARTHQUAKE! And y’all wanna be funny actin’ just because it was lookin’ like Sleepy Hollow outside! Shame on ya, because y’all missed a great show! I don’t know how I felt about Bradd Young’s black David Bowie swag – tight pants and all. He is my boy, so I’ll charge his Ziggy Stardust game to puttin’ the show in show business. And after seeing her in that Pulp Fiction wig, I’m more jealous than ever of Aloha Mischeaux because she can obviously make ANYTHING look good. J.R. had the folks ready to slam dance and D. Stone had jokes when managed to sneak one in on Yung Ro after he said “not today” after Young Ro’s almost famous “yes I’m rockin’ $200 jeans,” line. It was a good time for a good cause and plenty of you missed it. Y’all are really gonna have to make it up to me by showing up and showing out for the next couple of weeks, or I’m going to hit each and every one of y’all with a nonstop attack of Memory Pillows!
When keepin’ it ratchet goes wrong. Since I’m talkin’ Haiti, I might as well speak on another incident that stemmed from a worthy cause. So you know I had to show some love to Leslie and ‘nem at Diversity Gallery when she made her place the headquarters for a Haiti donation drop off point hosted by Hot 104.1’s Staci Static. National recording artist Teirrea (or however you spell it) Marie was on site to sign posters for those who gave and it started out really nice. But a few kindhearted reformed ratchets were in the house. And while they were tryin’ to be helpful, one offered a backhanded (actually, right hook would be more appropriate) compliment that had to have slapped Ms. Marie right in her pretty face. First they decided make her sing. No comment on the impromptu performance, because she was such a nice girl. Now I will give them props for being diplomatic and actin’ like they liked it. However, one of them took it from “girl, you so nice” to “no this heffa didn’t!” in record speed. She was like “girl, that was good.” I was kind of proud of them for faking it. “When does your new CD come out?” The one asked with genuine interest. Then, she says , “I’m gonna buy your album. I’m not gonna bootleg it either,” she goes on and on. Before I could finish my ‘Isn’t this sweet’ thought to myself, she kills it by saying, “I’m gonna buy your stuff and bootleg Lil’ Wayne. He don’t need my money.”
Give me a second to put on my sad face for Tieereeyea Marie .Okay I’m done. If ya’ll are reading Mediatakeout.com in the next few days and they claim she is depressed and on the verge of suicide, please know that her “episode” all started in the Lou.
Hey Little Walter. Please don’t tell him because it may make him uncomfortable when he comes to town next week, but Columbus Short’s performance was one of the few high notes of Cadillac Records. (And as bad as I want to do it…I’m mean really bad, y’all.. I’ve decided not to throw shade at Beyonce’s Etta re-enblacment. Now is not the time or the place) Here’s the secret: his Lil’ Walter portrayal reminds me of this dude I used to have a crush on in the 10th grade and it really does something for me. What? Don’t act like I’m the only one who still secretly goes wild for waves and a gold tooth! Plenty of the ladies act like it was his topless scene in You Got Served in Front of the Drumline Stomp the Yard that has you at hello, but I know what’s in your soul!
Anyway, Mr. Short…wait that didn’t sound right…Columbus has ‘next’ with respect to Karma’s never-ending bag of celebrity tricks…wait, that didn’t sound right either, did it? Anyway Walter…I mean Columbus will be in the building tomorrow. Would it be too much for me to ask him to put on a 14K clip on? I didn’t think so either. It goes down tomorrow night (Friday) and everyone is free.
Mya on the mic. The last celeb to stop through Karma had the men (especially Chingy) all hot and bothered in her solid gold tribute to the classic “En Vogue ‘Hold on to your Love’” dress. And I can’t even throw shade, because I was lookin’ for a 24-hour Fitness to get on an ab machine after seeing her in it. Anyway, she was nice enough but either she was a little “comfortable” or had to get on the little yellow bus, because she couldn’t quite get it together when she got on the mic. But you can tell she likes to have a good time, and I don’t mean that in a bad way. And everybody was gawkin.’ I thought that the Fire Marshall was gonna come and do a special V.I.P. code violation with everybody crowded into those booths.
A Bad Girl at Eye Candy. For their special 4th Anniversary/Calendar release edition of the MPAC Eye Candy Party, they are doin’ it big by bringing Natalie and her chin from the Bad Girls Club in as a celebrity guest judge. I’ve got two things to say about that. The first is “I run L.A.” The second is that they might want to make sure that they have all of the logistics together and maybe consider only having one girl on the stage at a time because if Natalie and her chin takes a look to the left, the MPAC may have to deal with a personal injury suit or two. Okay, I’m done being a bad girl…get it. The party goes down tomorrow night at the loft.
Prom revisited. Maranda Witherspoon is taking it back to prom with her 30th B-day Bash next Saturday at the Thaxton Speakeasy (1001 Olive) and I’m taking my original dress right out of the Stuart’s bag (yes, I said Stuart’s…don’t act like you’re unfamiliar with the OG Torrid!) and gettin’ it in! I still have my purple satin shoes and lace purse somewhere in my room at my granny’s house storage unit. What I’m really hopin’ is that Laurence Maroney will wear his birthday suit and we can be dates. Before y’all start the pregnancy rumors, I’m talking about the undelightful red and white tuxedo-like ensemble that he rocked at his b-day party at the Skybox a couple of years back so we can look like Mr. and Mrs. Vashon 1982…not him being in the buff! Although that wouldn’t be the worse thing for the ladies, now would it?
Notice Me. Be sure to cast your votes, before it’s too late! I would say vote for us, but I figured it wouldn’t be fair, would it? That’s: http://www.liquidassets-events.com/notice/awards.htm