When I was in elementary and junior high school, report card days were so exciting.
I would stand behind my brother and wait for my turn to hear the praises from my parents about how well I was doing. By the time I hit high school and started all the activities, I found my grades slipping.
When it was time for report card day, I would hide in the bathroom for an hour hoping my dad would fall asleep before I came out.
Thankfully, I quickly learned to balance activities and grades. Okay, I admit it – the belt helped me to learn faster.
My brother was very smart, and in those younger years he always did better than me. It was like he did not have to study.
I remember how embarrassed I was when I took a class with one of his former teachers and she told me that he had better handwriting than I did and suggested I practice so I could write just as neatly.
Because of the sting I felt early on with those comments of comparison, I try very hard not to compare my sons to each other on report card day.
However, my husband and I do have high standards for their education and expect them to do their best and we reward them for A’s and B’s.
If a child brings home a C, we tell him that he will get no money for the C but they can have an extra trip to the library to study.
They don’t like that option very much.
Report card day landed at our home recently, and the sons lined up to show their cards. The kindergartner gets only pass or still trying to learn symbols. Since he likes A’s and B’s better, we tell him that he has all passes which is the same as all A’s. He promptly takes his money and puts it in his piggy bank.
Son number three is the negotiator and starts explaining before he even hands over his report card.
“You see, one day I lost my assignment and that caused me to have a lower grade.” he nervously gives us his version of the truth.
Fortunately for him, he has five A’s and one B, so the explanation is not needed. He puts his money in his piggy bank.
Son number two – I constantly stay in touch with his teachers – gives us his report card and steadies himself for our response.
Last time he had 2 C’s and walked away with only enough money to buy an ice cream cone.
This time, he did much better and we let him know how proud we were. I think he was kind of shocked himself.
Lastly, son number one hands over his report card. The other kids kind of sigh… After all, this is the son who seems to always get good grades. As his brothers put it, “He doesn’t even have to study.”
Sounds just like a brother that I had.
He picks up his money and has enough to fill his wallet.
By the end of the report card session, there are no tears (that’s a plus), just a small lecture on trying a little harder in some areas and then lots of hugs to go around.
I want them to love education but also find a way to develop self-respect in being rewarded for a job well done.
Thanks for sharing