My husband has done two things most of the American public will never do. He has started his own business, and he has worn dreadlocks. However, while the business is kicking off, the beautiful locks are gone.
It was something I was hoping to avoid but that I knew was inevitable. Last Friday evening, after a particularly hot day, he had had enough and asked me to go get the scissors.
He has asked me to cut them several times before, I just refused to do so. I loved his hair. It was so strong, and it made him look even more handsome than he already did.
But, he is a practical man, and he explained to me that, while he worked outside as a landscaper and lawn care expert, the heat on those thick locks was often overwhelming. He had to wear a bandana to keep the dust and grass out of his hair, creating even more heat on his head. And, whenever he got them retwisted, he had to set aside four or more hours.
I did manage to pout my way into getting him to keep them for the last year. But, I knew in the end he would have to do what he wanted and needed to do. What neither of us counted on was how different he looked and the reaction from our church family.
Last Sunday, we held our first service in our new church, New Life in Christ Interdenominational Church on Troy-Scott Road in Lebanon, Illinois. Dozens of members, including our pastor, Dr. Dudley, stopped dead in their tracks, did double takes and let Patrick know how different he looked or how good they thought the locks had looked on him.
The reaction really took him aback. He was shocked. I was surprised that he was shocked. I thought he knew that most people thought they looked beautiful.
However, as most black women can attest, people of different ethnic groups often feel right at home commenting on our hair, “How do you get your hair like that?”
You can imagine the reactions to dreadlocks. “Do you wash them?” “Don’t they smell?” One woman even reached out and touched his hair once with a look of minor disgust on her face. So he had all that in mind and more when he decided to shed them.
But, in the Virgin Islands, where my husband was born, many conservative parents (his included) did not allow their children to wear dreadlocks, not wanting them to embrace the Rastafarian movement that believed that smoking ganja was a religious rite. Further back in time, dreadlocks developed as a means of defiance by ex-slaves in Jamaica. Funny how that impression has lasted.
I will admit here that as strong as he still looks, I do miss the locks. They gave the distinct impression that even his hair had strength of character. I am being a bit dramatic. But, so were his locks!