Columnist Carol Daniels
I realize that it’s not often that you think of gifts at Christmas as a moral obligation, but after interviewing a former St. Louis resident and author recently, I’ve adjusted my view.
Carla St. Rose Rein has written a shocking and sad story about the pain she endured at the hands of those who should have protected her. Her book is called The Land of Broken Toys. It’s easy to see that there is a gift that some of you can give that change the lives of everyone around you.
Her story made me think of the 2004 movie starring Kimberly Elise and Bishop T.D. Jakes, Woman Thou Are Loosed. Fortunately, Carla’s story does not begin with her on death row or end with her shooting her abuser during an alter call at church. However, the sexual abuse, rape and disbelief by her mother do mirror the powerful movie.
She said that after her mother divorced in the late ‘60s and began dating again, it wasn’t long until one of her mother’s boyfriends sexually assaulted her. When she resisted, he offered her a dollar to keep quiet. Three years later, her mother allowed the next boyfriend to move in, and she had to fight him off.
Eventually, she told her father. That was a Tuesday. Despite her pleas to him to not tell her mother, he did. Carla says her mother’s response was to slap her in the face and to later tell her that, “He gets his check Friday, and I’ll put him out then.” She says she was so hurt and angered that if she had had a gun, she would have used it on her mother.
Her distrust and anger only grew, and soon she would have more to be hurt and angry about. At 17, her mother married a man who she says did rape her and would continue to do so for well over a year. Carla eventually dropped out of school and had a nervous breakdown. She says she is certain her mother knew about the abuse and did nothing. However, that is something she’ll never know. Before she could confront her mother about the abuse, the woman who she says betrayed her passed away.
Carla says she wrote the book as part of her mission to let single mothers know that sexual predators are seeking them out as a way to get to their children. And, as a black woman, she says extra care must be taken, and the veil of secrecy and shame must be removed. She says her mother wasn’t a monster, just a woman who let her own needs blind her to the risks facing her daughter. That was a gift her mother could have given her but did not: protection.