This is a question ask myself quite frequently, and my answer always disturbs me because the number keeps dwindling.
There comes a time in each of our lives when we stare mortality directly in its face. Personally, as hard as I resist the thought, I find myself challenging the illusion of permanence. It is a part of life we cannot escape, and with the sudden passing of so many of my friends, I find myself continually reevaluating my priorities.
This doesn’t have to be morbid or depressing, but in our youth-obsessed culture some of the challenges we must face are key to successfully dealing with loss, especially close friends and family. Nothing shakes our personal world like losing a friend or loved one. Death is magnified when it strikes unexpectedly.
We realize that life is not always fair and that sometimes bad things happen to good people. And sudden death leaves us feeling shaken, unsure and vulnerable, as with the recent death of “Little” Milton Campbell. Milton died from a stroke in Memphis while preparing to do a film documentary. Milton has joined a list of my personal friends who lately has made the transition.
On February 10, 2005 in Chicago, my dear friend Tyrone Davis passed. Tyrone also suffered a stroke in early September, soon after leaving St. Louis. Tyrone and I were the only two artists for 4 Brothers records in 1965.
On April 13, Johnnie Johnson died in his sleep at home in North St. Louis County.
On June 22, Georgie Woods, a legendary radio disc jockey, died in Florida. Woods was a pioneer in Philadelphia during the 1950s and spent more than 40 years on the air. He was 78.
On July 22, Eugene Record, founder of the legendary Chicago-based vocal group The Chi-Lites, died after a long battle with cancer. At KWK, we were the ones who made “Have You Seen Her?” a national hit and forced the company to release it as a single. Eugene was 64.
July 1, Obie Benson of the Four Tops’ died in Detroit. He had turned 69 on June 14.
Each loss, whether sudden or not, created its own unique issues for me and, again, I squarely faced my own mortality. I’m only speaking from my personal experience, but I hope it will help me to see that I can become a better and stronger individual. Staying involved in family and community can help. I guess I will have to learn to deal with the shock, reactions and emotional aftermath of losing friends and colleagues, and remember that death is easiest for the person who dies and hardest for the survivors.
To my departed friends, Little Milton, Johnnie Johnson, Oliver Sain, Tyrone Davis, Eugene Record, Georgie Woods, Obie Benson, Gracie, E. Rodney Jones, Tommy Bankhead, Roscoe Gordon, Donnie Brooks, Rufus Thomas, and others, I must learn to cope with these new challenges and bid them farewell.
I can be reached by fax at (314) 837-3369 or by e-mail at: berhay@swbell.net.