Question: I have a question, not really a question, but I need to know. It’s not like I don’t know already, but I just need to make sure. Whew, I’m nervous. Ok, here it is…I am getting married in less that a week, there will be a head table and…people will be looking at me and…her family is huge and …I need a quick brush up on my manners! There, I said it. Please help!
Answer: You need to practice, and quick! So giddy-up, lets get going!
Weddings are the one occasion when everyone’s manners are on alert. You want everything to be perfect! YOU are the co-star (no pressure) of this rodeo. With all your friends and loved ones around there is a lot of activity, but all eyes (and cameras) will be on you.
To begin a harmonious life, YOU need to remember:
? Women are always right. Practice saying that out loud now. Your bride should be seated to your right.
? Next, go to the kitchen and notice there are two different-sized forks. The shorter one is for the salad, the longer one is for the main meal. At a table setting, the right side spoons are for coffee or tea, then the fork or spoon at the top of the plate is for dessert!
? Most importantly; refrain from talking when eating, fork waving, elbow resting, napkins as bibs, tooth picking and making any kind of “personal” adjustments at the table.
Still nervous? Practice makes perfect!
Q: I don’t own a suit. I work in a uniform, and most of the time I wear jeans, a shirt and a cap. I just received an invitation to a big event for my favorite charity. What should I do?
A: Take the plunge. Buy a suit. Or look at the invitation closely to find out what is the attire. A formal invitation usually does NOT suggest the attire (it is assumed). A semi-formal or casual event might (ex: wear a Hawaiian shirt). If you are still not sure, assume a suit with or without a tie is the least you can wear. Here are some quick pointers:
? White Tie – The pinnacle of formal wear. White or black silk tailcoat, standup collar, pearl or diamond cufflinks, silk socks to match suit color and a top hat!
? Black Tie or Formal – Prom, homecoming or wedding wear. Dark suit with cufflinks or tuxedo with pleated shirt, black patent shoes, colored tie or a cummerbund if a summer event.
? After Five/Semi-Formal – Suit with tie.
? Casual – Polo shirt or sweater with khakis, or sport jacket and loafers. Go wild!
When deciding what to wear, let your common sense override your personal preference.
Finally, “Drive- By” Manners are valuable and can be good for a quick fix. But most of the time you need something a little more filling to satisfy your Etiquette appetite. When you crave an answer to those embarrassing questions or uncouth situations, Mannerisms, LLC is here to tastefully get to the meat of the matter, so keep those questions coming.
We appreciate your support, and thank you for reading this column!
©2008 Madolena Key, Mannerisms LLC, www.mannerismsllc.net.