I used to watch this television show on Spike TV whenever I was bored or channel surfing; it was called 1,000 Ways To Die. When I watched the St. Louis Rams lose to the Philadelphia Eagles 34-28, I could’ve sworn this was a spinoff series called 1,000 Ways To Lose. Only the music would be different from this show.
For this new spinoff series, 1,000 Ways To Lose, the theme music would come from this old British comedy Benny Hill. It’s a perfect match when watching the Rams. Before the bye week, the Rams gave away a 21-0 lead to the Dallas Cowboys. Then they face an Eagles team that’s been ailing a little, struggling on offense and turning over the football, besieged by injuries themselves with a suspect secondary.
The Rams are like amoxicillin for any ailing team looking for a win and most important feel better on the inside. No excuse for losing this football game, none whatsoever. You can’t blame this on offensive coordinator Brian Schottenheimer. The Rams offense generated 466 yards of offense, they were 7/14 on third down, quarterback Austin Davis completed passes to 10 different Rams receivers and did a great job of using his mobility to extend plays.
The play of the offensive line was dreadful, and Austin Davis was fortunate not to leave the game on a golf cart or, worse, in an ambulance. Left tackle Jake Long is a liability he looks stiff like the rusty tin man in The Wizard of Oz or The Wiz, take your pick I love both movies.
On one of the Rams’ three fumbles, all Jake Long has to do is extend his tall six-foot-six frame over a rolling football near his own end zone, but that sounds too much like right. He’s not athletic enough. He can’t block in space – when the Rams attempted a screen in the red zone, Long got pushed backwards by an Eagles linebacker and the play went for naught. How does this happen?
This offensive line is suspect all the way down the line. They spring leaks. Had it not been for the athleticism by Davis, the Rams have no chance at coming back in the game.
The Rams’ defense is offensive. Second straight week the Rams offense puts up gaudy numbers, and again this vaunted defense that I once considered to be the heart and soul of this team is still searching for a pass rush. They got a big stop at the end of the game, but we know how the game ended.
What’s an episode of 1,000 Ways To Lose without penalties? How about 10 penalties for 82 yards? No excuse. No excuse. No excuse. This is Jeff Fisher’s third season as head coach, and the Rams still can’t stop doing harm to themselves. They keep this up, they’ll be the only team in the NFL with a wheel-chair lift on charter flights and team bus. I mean the whole right side of the bus comes down so they can board safely.
What makes the Jeff Fisher and Les Snead era different from what we’ve been witnessing prior to their arrival? The Rams keep losing.
They pushed all the chips in the middle of the table on two players recovering from an ACL injury, Sam Bradford and Jake Long. They re-signed oft-injured Roger Saffold, and then they used the number two pick in the draft on Greg Robinson, who had issues pass blocking. You draft him anyway hoping he’ll catch on and insert him into the lineup. What a glaring gaffe by the Rams. In today’s NFL, if you drafted that high you should be ready to plug in and play. But, you know what? This may no longer be a St. Louis Rams problem.
On 97.5 ESPN The Fanatic in Philadelphia, I was asked by host Phillip Allen about the Rams possibly moving and I put to him this way: The St. Louis Rams are very fortunate to have such a loyal fan base. They owe them an explanation. They’re still drawing 50,000 on Sundays while putting this product on display.
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