Warning: If you are under the age of 40, you may find the next several paragraphs unsettling. To the disbelief of many young people, sexual intimacy does not cease after a certain age and nor should it! Your body is not equipped with some pre-designed timer that will alarm and deem you unworthy of sex! Hopefully, that information was good news to many of you.
In 2010, the AARP surveyed middle age and older adults about their sex lives. There were three major findings.
- Close to three out of 10 respondents (28 percent) said they had sex at least once a week, including almost half of those who were single but dating or engaged, and 36 percent of those who were married.
- Eighty-five percent of men and 61percent of women said sex was important to their quality of life.
- Just 12 percent of single men who were dating and 32 percent of single women who were dating reported always using condoms during sex.
One of my favorite romantic comedies is “Something’s Gotta Give” featuring Jack Nicholson and Diane Keaton which debuted in 2003. Basically Jack Nicholson was this wealthy, older “player” who only dated women far younger than he until he met Diane Keaton, this successful middle-aged author who was not dating at all. The two became intertwined when Diane’s daughter, played by beautiful Amanda Peete, was visiting with her boyfriend, Jack Nicholson. uring that visit Jack suffered a heart attack and had to stay at Diane’s home to recuperate.
The movie also featured a very handsome, young doctor, Keanu Reeves, who was actively pursuing Diane Keaton. his love triangle brilliantly illustrated the insecurities men and women feel about embarking upon new relationships, particularly seniors. Diane’s character could not accept that a man younger than she could find her irresistible.
As a health class review, during puberty certain hormones begin to cause a host of biological, physical, and mental changes within the bodies of boys and girls. That girl who was once “yucky” has now become the most phenomenal girl in the world and feelings of disgust have morphed into lust. Remember that time in your life?
During adolescence, the twenties and early thirties, sex was probably the number one topic on the minds of most boys, men and some girls and women. Just being in the same room with someone of the opposite gender would cause a heightened sense of desire. As you began to age, those desires lessened some but were not eradicated.
Some physiological changes of the male and female body during the maturation process, however, are common. For example, individuals may not be as easily aroused as in their former years. Men may not be able to achieve or maintain an erection naturally or women may experience pain during intercourse because of vaginal dryness. These changes are hormonal and can be remedied by certain medications, lubricants, or gels.
Now by this point, I am sure many of you are blushing and saying to yourselves: “I can’t believe that she is talking about this!” Exactly! Over the years, I have become quite concerned about the lack of frank conversation in our communities about intimacy, sex, and more importantly safe sex. We have not taken much of a proactive stance on these issues. On the contrary, our reactionary response has allowed us to sit idly on the side lines and watch as the rates of HIV and STIs (sexually transmitted infections) rise. And as a wake-up call to many, this rise in STIs has not escaped seniors.
From 2000 to 2010, the CDC (Centers for Disease Control) reports that the number of syphilis cases in 45 to 64 year olds grew from 900 cases to 2,500 cases. Among that same age group and time frame, Chlamydia cases went from 6,700 to 19,600. I would classify those statistics as alarming. Would you not agree?
Many believe that these numbers are reflective of the increase use of ED (erectile dysfunction) drugs such as Cialis, Viagra, and Levitra and the sense of freedom seniors enjoy once the fear of reproduction is absent. It is also possible that baby boomers are continuing their sexual exploration that began in the 60’s. Internet dating is also a major factor since it entered the scene about the same time as the ED medications.
Sexual health is no less important than physical and mental health. Seniors can maintain an active sex life as long as they desire. However, seniors are not exempt from the same precautions extended to young adults. Sexually transmitted infections do not discriminate. Good sex is safe sex.
Yours in Service,
Denise Hooks-Anderson, M.D.
Assistant Professor
SLUCare Family Medicine
yourhealthmatters@stlamerican.com
