“font-family: Verdana; font-size: 9pt;”>“I hate to say it, but at

this point in your life it’s not about finding the man of your

dreams anymore.”

“font-size: 9.0pt; font-family: Verdana;”>Couldn’t that be the most

unromantic love advice that anyone has ever given? And so close to

Valentine’s Day.

“font-size: 9.0pt; font-family: Verdana;”>I was in the midst of one

of those funks. You know, the point when – despite usually being a

good sport while the folks are boo’d up all around you – you get

caught in a moment where the frustration of “the lonely monster”

supersedes patient and purposeful waiting.

“font-size: 9.0pt; font-family: Verdana;”>Most of the time people

offer stock good weather report catchphrases (pun intended) to

sooth the single black females’ soul – and we’ve heard them all.

“When the time is right, he’ll show up,” or “wait on God,” and

let’s not forget the most confusing of the bunch, “you just have to

put yourself out there.” I’ve been hearing that last one for the

better part of 20 years and whenever I do, I’m hoping for subtitles

to appear across the “wise” person’s forehead.

“font-size: 9.0pt; font-family: Verdana;”>But a male friend’s

advice was unlike anything I’ve ever heard before and I didn’t

quite know how to take it.

“font-size: 9.0pt; font-family: Verdana;”>Be honest, ladies (and

the two gentlemen who aren’t black and single by design). Even

though those encouraging nuggets folks “impress upon our heart”

have about as much value to us as a Chuck E. Cheese token, we still

let them marinate in our hearts and mind with the resolve that if

enough people say it, it must be true.

“font-size: 9.0pt; font-family: Verdana;”>So then, how am I

supposed to feel when someone essentially says, “Girl, get someone

you can hold a conversation with – and enjoy each other’s company –

 and be done with it?”

“font-size: 9.0pt; font-family: Verdana;”>Me being me, instead of

me taking stock in his advice I started agonizingly analyzing what

led him to his conclusion.

“font-size: 9.0pt; font-family: Verdana;”>“Is it because I’m too

old?” I thought to myself. “I mean, my late thirties are looking me

dead in the face and I don’t even have anyone to play Xbox Kinect

with besides my nine-year-old nephew?”

“font-size: 9.0pt; font-family: Verdana;”>I just couldn’t imagine

that he would whip those words of wisdom on a spry 22-year-old if

they reached out to him for the same reason – yes, that’s right, we

are thinking about settling down at 22!

“font-size: 9.0pt; font-family: Verdana;”>Am I out of traditional

romance options already? That sucks. I thought I at least had until

the big 4-0 to bide some time.

“font-size: 9.0pt; font-family: Verdana;”>Then I thought, “Maybe

he’s telling me this because he thinks I should settle” quickly

followed by a “why should I be the one to have to settle? I hear

all of these beautiful, poetic courtship stories and by patiently

waiting, I’ve earned the right to AT LEAST one of

those.”

“font-size: 9.0pt; font-family: Verdana;”>I pictured myself

surrendering to the idea of just snatching myself up someone that

doesn’t irritate me after a few hours of hang time and being done

with it.

“font-size: 9.0pt; font-family: Verdana;”>Something about even the

mere simulation of such left me wanting more. Would I always

secretly search for an upgrade with my “compatible match” or play

the “weigh your options game” when a newer model enters the

picture?

“font-size: 9.0pt; font-family: Verdana;”>By the time I was done

allowing my imagination to have its way with the play-by-play that

I assumed would come by way of his unorthodox matchmaking

suggestion (well, at least for the ladies, anyway), I was all but

appalled.

“font-size: 9.0pt; font-family: Verdana;”>I was so worked up –

keeping it all inside of course – I almost missed his “that’s what

I did,” post-script.

“font-size: 9.0pt; font-family: Verdana;”>At that moment, I thought

about how utterly “ride or die” he is for his girlfriend –

actually, it’s his fiancée – and it all grew out of a simple

decision to pursue somebody who he just felt comfortable with. I’m

assuming there were no sparks or lightning bolt of love at first

sight that kicked off with her giving him those sexy kitty cat paws

and come-hither hand motions after their eyes met from across the

room.

“font-size: 9.0pt; font-family: Verdana;”>But, based on the

conversation that immediately preceded his advice, there doesn’t

seem to be a “grass is always greener effect” I assumed would

linger in this type of relationship foundation either.

“font-size: 9.0pt; font-family: Verdana;”>We had just finished

talking about a “dime” who’s been dropping polite, but overt,

displays of her interest in him. “Man, too bad I’m not single,” he

said, “but, oh well.”

Leave a comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *